Tell Your Trainer to Take Her Fad Diet and Shove It (nicely of course)

From time to time I will use a trainer.  It seems indulgent, but I enjoy the challenge; it encourages me to mix up my routine; and will rescue me if I have been a total slug.  For example, the holiday indulgences that seem to have been going on forever....we all splurge; it's a part of enjoying life, but it's time to get back on track.

But I digress, my trainer and I had words.  She sent out instructions to start juicing to get into the swing of getting back into shape.  She told me I needed to detox.  That it was going to make me lose weight quick and fast.  I told her to take her juicing philosophy and keep it to herself.  I don't believe in juicing as a diet.  First off, if I am going to drink my calories, it's going to be a glass of wine.  I don't drink soda, sweetened beverages, fancy coffee mixes, etc. for this very reason. I like to eat my calories.  Most drinks and juices are unnecessary sugars added to your diet that you don't need unless you are having a once in awhile indulgence.  Second, I like to EAT my calories (did I mention this before).  I must be part cow.  I need to masticate to be satisfied.  Juicing doesn't do it for me.  And if I am not satisfied by my meal, you can bet your bottom dollar that I will cheat.  My body needs food, and it needs real food; yours does too.  Take all those fruits and veggies you stuffed in that juicer and chow your way through a salad.  I guarantee you will feel FULL.



There is a whole philosophy behind juicing.  If that's your thing, knock yourself out.  It isn't like it is unhealthy per se, but if I am going to turn a bunch of fruits and veggies into a drink (I'd rather eat them anyway....did I mention I like to EAT?), I will turn them into a smoothie.  I think juicing is inherently wasteful of the food God gave us--there is SOOOO much waste of food to get a tiny old glass of juice. Plus, you get rid of all the good fiber when you juice that makes you feel full and helps with regulation (you know, going to the bathroom.....).  The fiber God put into fruits and vegetables is REALLY important.

The other issue with this whole approach to juicing to "detox" and create a lifelong diet for yourself, is that it doesn't work for most people. Most people like me, like food.  They want to eat.  Juicing isn't going to be a magic bullet to your food issues.  You may lose weight juicing in a short fix diet, but it will do nothing to help you maintain a long term weight loss and establish a healthy diet that you can live with.  Juicing sets up this mind set that you need to eat a certain way, focus on an elimination diet of things you can't have, and then when you have done all that, then you'll be skinny. 

Well that's the complete wrong approach and it makes me mad that trainers set up clients for this failure.  You know how to lose weight?  Quit trying to be skinny. Quit thinking there is a one size fits all to your body.  God created you wonderfully, fearfully, awesomely made as you are. You need to love yourself.  Not everyone is going to be stick thin.  You want to lose weight?  Fix your issues with food.  Then, eat real food that God gave you, in moderation, WHEN YOU ARE HUNGRY (God save me from another trainer that tells me I need to eat every two hours.  I'm not HUNGRY every two hours).  If you are hungry every two hours, that might be a different story, but any which way you look at dieting there are two facts:  No two people are made the same way, and no one diet is going to fit every single person.  THERE IS NO MAGIC BULLET TO WEIGHT LOSS.  It takes discipline, eating a variety of healthy foods, moderation, listening to your body, eating real foods, exercising, and getting back on track when you slip off the wagon, and learning to love yourself at whatever size God has made you.  I could be a heck of a lot skinnier than I am, but I'd also be a heck of a lot unhappier.  I'm healthy as I am, I'm tough, I'm a fighter, and I am REALLY, really happy that God made me as I am (broken bits and all).

It's one thing if you don't know HOW to eat healthy, but I actually do, and I really resent this bill of goods that the fitness industry tries to sell us every January that there are magic bullets to get us fit and healthy and well.  It isn't true.  LIFELONG FITNESS TAKES establishing a routine of HABITS that you repeat OVER and OVER and OVER until they are a part of your life.  Juicing for ten days isn't going to establish a habit. It takes MONTHS to establish a habit.  MONTHS.  And it is sooooooo worth it.  Kick, the crap out of your kitchen--the processed foods, the excessive sugar.  Focus on food from God's good earth.  Make these nutrients a habit.

Forming good habits is hard work.  Try brushing your teeth with the other hand for a week.  Does it become natural?  No.  It could take up to six months to make that habit switch in your brain.  Try eating with your non-dominant hand, or writing with your other one.  You've formed a habit with these behaviors and it takes a lot of focus and determination to change those habits.  Our habits are rooted in what we've been taught, how we were raised, what we were instructed about food, what we were given as a diet growing up, how we sleep, how we exercise, how we've used food and negative thoughts to cope, or how we have developed addictions.  Until you address the root of your issues, and learn that YOU HAVE VALUE, then a lot of your behaviors are not going to change.  This is why so many new year's resolution's fail, because the individual hasn't addressed the issue at the heart of what they want to change.

If you cannot change your habit for yourself, consider changing it for your health, your family, and for God.  Dedicate your new year to loving yourself as the temple of Christ in this world around you.  Dedicate your body to mind, body and spiritual wellness. For forty days, thinking about changing the way you think about yourself, your exercise, your body and your food.  Maybe then change will begin to happen.  You are worth it.  You have a purpose here and being healthy is a part of that journey.

But for the love of God, don't think that juicing for ten days is going to do that for you.


****Some people really love fresh juice.  Good for them.  There is a ton of healthy vitamins and minerals in a good juice.  It's just not my thing.  And yes, I've done that.  I had a juicer and I swapped it with my pal Sara for a couch.  That's kind of the relationship I had with my juicer.  :)  If it is your thing, own it, but own it for the right reasons.

Love y'all--love all of y'all and how you are made.
~Anna

Lent is NOT Christmas

Lent is not like Christmas. People drag their feet towards lent rather than the eager countdown to Christ's birth.  The Easter bunny does not hold a candle to Santa Claus.  I think deep down we know that we may have focused a little too much on the secular side of the holiday, focusing on gifts and parties and indulgences rather than the coming of Christ. 

During Lent, we cannot do this.  Lent is a period of preparation for the greatest gift of them all:  Christ's death and resurrection.  Lent is a time where we need to prepare ourselves to be worthy of the gift of Christ's sacrifice. Lent reminds people that they need to change. While the gift of Christ is freely given, it comes at a cost. The cost of Jesus' crucifixion. The crucifixion is also freely given, yet it reminds us that we need to be better people to honor the gift of death in order that we might have life everlasting.  The gift of the resurrection reminds us all that God has the power to transform. 

God has transformed me.  When I was 12, I lost my hearing to an auto-immune disease.  At the time, the doctors did not know what was going on with me.  My blood work was very abnormal and I was put on many experimental therapies to try and stop my hearing loss.  Three years later, many drug therapies later, I still lost all my hearing.  I stand before you today, legally deaf.  I wear cochlear implants that allow me to hear, but for a period of time, I did not hear at all. 

During this time, I have a very vivid memory of being at church.  We had all stood to say the Nicene Creed.  I could not hear at all.  At this point, I was deaf and without any hearing aids.  I became very, very angry.  I felt abandoned by God, and I thought it was very pointless to be at church when I felt that I could not participate in the liturgy.  I remember to this day, the furious tears, and the hot feeling under my skin as I sat down and refused to participate in the rest of the service.  My mind was screaming, "How can I do this and not hear?" 

And then the Eucharist began. I felt a sudden peace come over me.  My tears stopped.  My heart rate slowed.  I felt like I was being hugged.  I distinctly remember the presence of the Holy Spirit.  And it spoke to me.  And I heard God tell me that I did not have to HEAR to participate.  My Christ Walk had little to do with what I was HEARING and everything to do with what I was doing in my life. 

Throughout the years, I have come to realize that God gave me other gifts besides my hearing (and now my cancer).  And I have learned that I can manage my disease through exercise, good nutrition and managing my mind, body, and spiritual health.  I invite you to join me in the Christ Walk program to see how the Holy Spirit can transform your life, mind, body and spirit.

Christ Walk is a 40 day program designed to prepare yourself mind, body and spirit to lead a Christ-filled life that is also healthy.  In 1 Corinthians, 6:19, Paul states: "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you?" 

Our bodies house the gift of the Holy Spirit.  Very few of us treat our bodies like temples.  Rather, we make choices that treat our bodies in a careless fashion.  We eat too much, drink too much, fail to exercise, misuse medications, stress too much and make choices that do not care for this body that has the Holy Spirit within us.  We do not treat ourselves like temples. 

Lent is an opportunity for us to relook at our everyday habits, not only spiritually, but also physically and mentally so that we can turn to Christ in all of our choices, not just in our prayer life.  A Christ-like life, is something that we should chose to try and live each day.  Not just on church holidays. 

This Lent, you have chosen to do the Christ Walk program.  What does this mean? Instead of giving up chocolate, or sweets or other temptation, I ask you to take a walk with me.  Christ Walk is a Lenten devotional that uses walking different biblical routes to symbolize the journey we take with Christ in our everyday life.  You will choose a biblical route to walk this Lent.  They are listed in the appendix of the Christ Walk book.  You will choose one of the routes that appeals to you.   There are many different routes you can symbolically walk during the next 40 days.  You will collect miles towards your route in different ways.  You can walk, bike, swim, volunteer or pray in order to earn miles towards your route.  By the end of Lent, you will have collected enough miles towards your chosen route and completed your journey. 

Some examples of the different routes you can walk include the following:  One route is the distance between Bethlehem and Jerusalem; signifying the journey between Christ's beginning and his end.  Another route is the "Via Delarosa, or the Way of Sorrows.  This route is the journey Jesus made as he walked through Jerusalem towards the cross.  There are several routes from Paul's missionary journeys.  There are many different routes to choose from.  You will  choose a route that calls to you. 

If you are unable to exercise, each 15 minute block of prayer, volunteerism, or outreach opportunity you take on will count as a "mile" towards your goal.   Christ Walk is designed for anyone at any level of fitness to participate.  In fact, I have had Christ Walk participants in wheelchairs and walkers that have found ways to earn miles during their Christ Walk journey.  Your miles, however you walk, run, bike, swim or pray through are steps you can use on your walk with Christ. 

The goal of Christ Walk is to build a strong temple so that we all can continue to do the work that Christ calls us to do in the world.   

God does call us to change.  We are called in our baptismal covenant.  We are called when we confirm that we are members of the body of Christ during confirmation.  We are called daily to represent God's love here on earth.  This is not just a call of prayer, but also a call of action.  Being a Christian is all about everything we DO and every way we ACT and the CHOICES we make not only with one another, but also with ourselves.

When I was growing up, I used to say Christmas was my favorite holiday. My father, a priest, would always say that Good Friday and Easter were his. This always made me scratch my head as a child

As I have grown older, the gift of Easter grows each year and I have come to think of it as my favorite holiday. I use the Lenten period to prepare myself mind, body and spirit to receive the gift of God and strengthen my skills to use myself in God's calling in my life. Lent is a time that we can spring clean our lives mind, body and spirit so we are prepared for the springing of Easter. Lent is my time to rededicate myself to God's calling in my life.

Lent is not something to drag one's heels. Rather, look with anticipation the coming journey and the change God can make within you. At the end of this forty days, You WILL be a changed person.  

In closing, I would like to share with you the Christ Walk prayer: 

The Lord be with you: 

I will try this day to walk the path set before me

I will try to walk a little longer, a little stronger
I will walk with my mind, body and spirit
I will walk with others, I will walk for others
I will walk when others cannot
I will be still and know that you are God on the days I cannot walk
I will walk with you Lord, on the path you set before me

When my own feet fail, I know you will help me get up and walk again
I will imagine what it would be like to walk in Christ's shoes
And try to live my life as though I was on Christ's path
I will pray that I walk the path I am called to and not turn down paths I am not
Today, Lord, on my journey I will Christ Walk
And I am thankful that you Christ Walk with me too.
Amen (Used with Permission, Christ Walk: A 40-Day Spirtual Fitness Program, 2015, Church Publishing Incorporated)

Come, Christ Walk with me.

Part II: My Body the Battleground

My body is the battleground of my war with health and I have the scars to show for it.

My health has been a battle for me most of my life.  Not a war with anything life-threatening, but a chronic, nagging, ongoing battle against chronic disease.

My body is riddled with scars on my head, chest, arms, legs, back and stomach.  I have been asked if I was burned, abused, obese, or hurt myself.  They are a combination of red and white and pink and purplish slashes across my skin.  Sometimes they ache.  They are stretchmarks, and surgery scars from the effects of high dose steroids and chemotherapy drugs I took as a child to try and prevent my hearing loss.

They often make me hate my body.  Most days, I am a warrior. I am more than the skin I wear.  Other days, I get angry, and I wish and want for something else, something more, something smooth and pretty and not ugly.  I get angry sometimes about the battle between what I want to be able to do with my body and what my body is able to do.  I secretly wish for a different body just like everyone else.

My children have reached out to my scars and asked me what happened and I have told them.  Their reply, "Ooh, texture!"

I have told my husband that sometimes my scars make me feel ugly.  His reply: "You are beautiful, they are battle scars."

I have told God, that I sometimes wish for a different body.  God's reply: "You don't need one."

I am who I am, scars in all.  So, if I wear a bikini, or a short skirt or a tank top.  It's not to be immodest, or sexy (well, maybe for my husband) or provocative;  it's to thumb my nose at my body and define myself as more than the scars that make me, me. Sure, you'll see me hanging out with lumps, bumps, scars and all, but it's my way of overcoming this shell I have and showing my kids that the outside doesn't matter.

Your shell doesn't matter either.  It's what you do with it. I'd really like it if we all stopped beating ourselves up over the scars we carry.  People love us, scars and all.  They are the texture of our life.  The road map of what we have accomplished and what we will continue to accomplish. My scars are my testament that God has lifted me up far higher than I could have done on my own through what has happened to me.

Will I continue to have days where I wish for smooth, unblemished skin? Probably.  I am human.  I slip back and want for something I don't have, nor will ever have, but each day I have worn my scars, I am reminded that I have overcome something that for a moment of my life defined me like nothing else.  I was marked, and I am different because of it. 

You have been marked too.  You will be different as well.  These life changes mark us as Christ's own forever.

Are you 1 in 4?

September 8-12 is Suicide Prevention Awareness Week.  In my professional life, organizations are addressing suicide, depression, anxiety, post traumatic stress and other mental health issues.  With 1 in 4 Americans dealing with mental health issues we need to mount a war against stigma.  Mental Health is just as important as Physical Health.  You can die from mental illnesses, just as you can from physical disease.  When I see statistics like "1 in 4," I look around at the closest four people around me at that time, or on social media and realize that 1 of any 4 individuals I deal with on a daily basis is struggling mentally.  This is a sobering thought.  If I put myself in their shoes, I begin to understand that each day is struggle...a fight with dealing with what their brain tries to tell them, and what their heart believes.  When the chemicals in the brain get mixed up, it is very difficult to tell right from wrong, feel joy, hear salvation, or be in the moment.  Mental illness has a very physical pain from which it is difficult to escape.

Hence suicide.  Sometimes suicide for people seems like the only answer.

It isn't.

With the recent suicide of Robin Williams, a slew of pundits waded in to the discussion on depression, suicide and mental health.  Some actually knew what they were talking about, others spoke from personal experience, and others spoke from ignorance. I am not a behavior health professional, but I am someone who has had suicide touch my life on multiple occaisions.  And I am a caring, Christian person who would like to reach out to any of the 1 in 4 and say, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  There is HELP and SUPPORT and HANDS for any of the 1 in 4.  DO NOT GIVE UP THAT SOMEONE WANTS AND NEEDS YOU IN YOUR LIFE.  When there is 1 in 4, there are 3 other people to help.

My children do not have a grandfather because of suicide.  My husband and his sister miss their father because of suicide.  I watched my own father flirt with suicide in the midst of a rapidly, unraveling, unstable bout with depression.  I remember watching my father drive off one day and wonder if he would come home.  My family lost a dear Catholic priest/friend succumb to depression and mental illness and kill himself.  I have had nursing colleagues kill themselves.  Soldiers are killing themselves from the mental anguish of war. Teenagers are killing themselves because they do not see any other options.

My father was a priest.  This was not supposed to happen to spiritual people, but it does.  It's not supposed to happen to professional people, but it does.  It is not supposed to happen to "strong, heroic" people,  but it does.  Mental Illness happens to 1 in 4. Mental illness touches all religions, all denominations, all races, all sexes, ALL PEOPLE.  If 1 in 4 suffer from mental illness, are you one of them?

A lot of people refer to suicide as the rock bottom of their depression and mental illness.  When I reached rock bottom with my own health, it remember it was really difficult to see the purpose of my life.  Thank God for God.  For me, God was the life-line for getting my life back on track and seeing purpose, even when my body wasn't doing what I wanted it to do.

As Christian's, we can show God's love to people with mental illness by being their life-line when their minds are not functioning the way they are supposed to function.  We can be the other 3 that reach out a hand to the 1 in 4.  Mental illness happens.  It happens to a lot of people.

If you are of the 1 in 4, read this and know that you are NEEDED, WANTED, and have PURPOSE in this world.  I believe fiercely that human life is sacred and special.  You are a LIFE worth being in this world and God put you here for a reason.  Don't throw that away with suicide.  You may be the missing grandparent, parent, brother, sister, or friend in someone's life if you commit suicide.  It's a hole that never goes away.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-TALK.  Pick up the line.  Call them, call a friend, call your pastor, call a family member, but don't leave us.  We need you here.

Where have I been???

Lord have mercy!  It has been almost two months since I have posted a blog.  I am hanging my head in shame.  WHERE have I been?  I have been asking myself that question a lot lately.  Where is the time going? Where did the month of July go?  Where did the month of August go?  School?  School is starting?  Where did summer go?  We are talking about moving again????

Without fail, life happens.  It is one of my phrases to describe my life.  It just happens some days.  I do not have to do much these days but watch as it unfolds since I have my hands in the thick of so many activities.  Without fail, I usually over-extend myself and my head begins to spin.  I am much like any other mother out there. Sometimes we need a mother of our own to keep up with what we have managed to get ourselves involved in.

So what is new?  I ran my race:

We traveled like crazy people (but we got to hike, exercise, see the God's amazing world and do burpees along the way!)

(I did this burpee challenge this summer to keep myself committed to exercise during the craziness of my schedule.  You can ready more about the 100 day burpee challenge here.  I don't advise it.  This is the second time I've done it and I'm really not sure why I did it again.  I'm a glutton for punishment.




I then traveled for work. And then spent the next couple of weeks trying to resolve some health issues.  Just when you think you have your body in shape and in control, it has other ideas.  The body is WEIRD.


Then I celebrated my 16th anniversary to my love:


Somehow, we got the kids ready for school:

And I completely redesigned my blog, my facebook page and my twitter account in anticipation of the new book release (so excited!  Fist pump!)

You can pre-order it here.


This is kind of how I feel now:


But it has been an amazing summer and I am getting back in the swing of things and ready to share my thoughts, feelings and teachings on a healthy, Christ-centered life: mind, body and spirit.

If there is anything this summer has taught me is that it is a balance of mind, body and spiritual health that gets me through the craziness of life happening.  This way, it's more than just a ride, It's an expression of all that I am.